Never have I seen a truer statement than the one emblazoned on this tin I saw at CVS the other day.

Twenty-five black hair ties just waiting to get lost.
চিন্তা করো না; they’ll disappear before you know it.


Props to the person who thought of this, because you and I both know that it’s only a matter of time before those ties disappear into that household wormhole that swallows all of the black hair ties in the world and sends them to their mysterious final destination.

Where do they all go?

Until the scientific community figures it out, I will continue to work under the assumption that they go to the cosmic playground in the sky where angel kitties swat at them for hours on end.


বিড়াল এবং মেকআপ sweatshirt ??

$ 42.

এখনই কিনুন

I’ve actually got a black tie in my hair best now because I’m typing and painting my nails. ’cause that’s how I roll. Paint, type, paint, type…

Oh, noooo. Is that a nick on my thumbnail?

Wait — it’s not. WHEW! *wipes sweat off brow.*

As I was saying, I’m multitasking, even though I’m running the risk of inadvertently denting a freshly painted paw.

Faster, pussycat

I recently figured out a way to speed up the process even more, because, frankly, who has the time? Why fritter away 30 minutes of your life waiting for paint to dry when you could be doing things like squats or enjoying a Keanu Reeves film (I know I’ve been talking about him a lot lately, but can you blame a girl?).

Also, I think I finally nailed (ha ha ha) the “speed mani” thanks to these few products. I’m completely done in 15 minutes. বাস্তব জন্য. everything dries very quickly, and the mani lasts a long time. I’m talking zero-to-very-few chips for a full week.

It’s all about that base

It starts with Sally Hansen No much more stains Spray-On Base Coat, which is also fun to use.

Doesn’t it look like a travel perfume bottle?

You just spray the clear base coat on bare nails (one or two spritzes per nail), and the thin protective layer dries in less than a minute. You don’t have to be very accurate about it (it’s like you’re spraying hairspray on the suggestions of your fingers). just spray, spray, spray, and ya done!

T-minus 300 seconds

On top of that, I add a couple layers of a nude shade from the Essie Gel Couture line, and it doesn’t seem to matter which color I wear — tan, pink, peach, taupe. Whichever direction I choose to go, the end result looks so-fresh-so-clean, even after a week.

Duuuuude! I’m also all about the brush. It’s broader and flatter that a common nail polish brush, so I can paint from base to suggestion in even, smooth strokes.

Today’s/this week’s mani uses a creamy warm peach called Spool Me Over.

Um…or is it pink? Peachy pink? I can’t really tell, but I like that about it. (Of course the gemini in me would love nail polishes with two seemingly distinct personalities!)

Two coats in five minutes, tops.

A fantastic top coat

The final, and probably many vital, part of “le speed mani” involves Essie Gel Couture Platinum grade Finish.

FYI, I’ve seen the packaging both with the silver band around the base of the cap, and without, and apparently they’re both the same product, just with different caps.

Anyway, this is the shiniest, sturdiest top coat I’ve tried.

Yes, I know those are combating words… Hoop earrings are off, so let’s go. হাঃ হাঃ হাঃ!

One coat protects your paws like Seche Vite or the Smith & Cult top coat, but it fully sets in a fraction of the time. I give it a full 10 minutes (better safe than sorry) to fully bake, and after that it’s rock solid…like the bond between the ladies of Claws.

Damn, those girls are ride-or-die. Seriously, you’ve got to get into that show if you aren’t enjoying it already. It’s completely bonkers and completely ridiculous, but you will be sucked in.

I’ve used this as a top coat on non-gel polishes, too, and it delivers equally outstanding longevity.

Bounce, baby, bounce

One last thing before my fresh paint and I peace out: Ciara’s video for Thinkin Bout You. This is my new “happy” tune and the current warmup song on my workout playlist.

I just feel fantastic when it’s playing and I’m bopping and bouncing around to it… The person who did the body makeup in this video needs to text me that magic recipe ASAP (I’m wondering if it’s MAC face and Body?) because every inch of Ciara’s skin looks otherworldly!

Oh, and the scene where she turns on all the fans and sings into a broom deal with as her hair blows back in the wind? Hello, is that my life?? I may or may not have done the same exact thing this morning. ?


Enjoy the song, and don’t forget to stop to let that booty pop-pop-pop!

আপনার বন্ধুত্বপূর্ণ প্রতিবেশী কবজ আসক্তি,